It's Monday, and my inbox is full of weekend shenanigans that need attention. One particular message stirred up some emotions. A dog owner had made a significant mistake—one they didn’t even realize was wrong. Instead of reacting emotionally, I turned to God's word for guidance. If you think it’s unusual for a dog trainer to reach for the Bible, check out my previous blog post here.
I consider myself a teacher—both to owners and their dogs. People often tell me I’m good at it, which is wonderful, but I still struggle at times. I know other trainers do too because they tell me so. While our struggles are similar, our ways of handling them can be vastly different.
Sometimes, my human students do things that frustrate me simply because they lack knowledge. What seems like common sense to me as a professional isn’t always intuitive for them—after all, that’s why they hire me. Their internet searches often lead them down unhelpful paths, so when they come to me with questions, it’s my job to provide clear, accurate guidance.
When a student makes a mistake and seeks my advice, my response must be constructive. They’re not coming to me to be belittled or reprimanded—they trust me to help them. In moments of frustration, it’s tempting to react harshly. But I remind myself that what I know about dogs isn't common knowledge. Sometimes, I forget that.
A Lesson in Patience and Understanding
I recalled a verse from Proverbs and think about it daily:
"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." – Proverbs 15:1
I could have reacted with frustration, telling them what they did was wrong and should never be repeated. But that wouldn’t teach. In fact, responding with anger is harmful—not just to the owner but also to me. Wasting time on frustration doesn’t help the dog. If owners feel they’re constantly failing, they may give up entirely, either accepting chaos or surrendering their dog.
I know many dog trainers struggle with this. When trainers get together, conversations often focus on the mistakes clients make. But why do we spend so much time complaining instead of collaborating on solutions?
If we approached these situations with gentleness, dog owners would actually learn. Instead of simply being told they did something wrong, they would gain the knowledge to handle challenges effectively.
The Power of Love Over Frustration
Don’t waste time being frustrated when someone seeks your help. They want your guidance, not your wrath.
I love dogs, but I love people too. If you became a dog trainer because you dislike people and would rather work with dogs, you’re missing a key element of a fulfilling career. If you hold resentment toward people based on past experiences, I encourage you to rethink those feelings. Hatred, no matter how justified it feels, clouds your ability to interact positively with those who genuinely seek your help. Holding onto anger does nothing to improve your life or your work.
Luke 6:27-28 says:
"But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you."
Why should we pray for those who mistreat us? Why should we love those who wrong us? Because hatred does nothing to make things better. Love is always more powerful—whether in relationships between dog and owner, owner and trainer, or trainer and fellow trainers.
Supporting Each Other as Trainers
Some trainers see others as competition, blaming them for their own struggles. Some even try to tear down colleagues who use different methodologies or find more success. If you’ve been attacked this way, know that this struggle is not unique to dog training—it happens in every profession.
Luke 6:35 reminds us:
"But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back."
Repetition is common in the Bible, just as it is in training. Just as we repeat lessons to reinforce good behavior in dogs, we must reinforce positive attitudes in ourselves.
For those who criticize others harshly, consider Luke 6:42:
"How can you say to your brother, 'Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,' when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."
It’s easy to point out flaws in others. But do we hold ourselves to the same scrutiny? Are we as kind to others as we are to ourselves?
A Call for Kindness and Collaboration
That morning, when I read the message that initially angered me, I reflected on my own past mistakes—times when I acted without knowing better. Instead of reacting with frustration, I responded with patience. I provided clarity without judgment. I explained why their approach wasn’t ideal and encouraged them to try again.
What if we treated other trainers the same way? Instead of tearing each other down, what if we helped guide one another? The current mentality of destroying a competitor’s reputation over minor differences is driving good, well-intentioned trainers away from the profession. If we chose respect and support over competition, we could help more owners, more dogs, and create a stronger community.
How you interact with dog owners, the dogs you train, and your fellow trainers matters.
Are you being harsh in situations that call for gentleness?
Do you love what you do? Do you love the dogs? Do you love the people?
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